Just because you’re sad doesn’t mean you self diagnose yourself with depression! Same with being anxious & having anxiety… & don’t even try to compare being moody to living with Bipolar Disorder!
Everyone has stress and difficult emotions from time to time and that is normal. Mental illness, on the other hand, is any condition that makes it difficult to function in daily life. It can affect your relationships, your job, or prevent you from reaching any attainable goal!
Most of us who have been truly diagnosed & are living with Mental Disorders are ashamed!!! Some go their entire lives hiding their miserable secret, scared of bad judgement. Or they go spread their story of love & war hoping it’ll help the next teenager through the most challenging years of their life! Getting diagnosed or “labeled” isn’t rewarding at all! & the only person judging you is you!!! Imagine your own conscience being a 24/7 bully! No one can discourage or put you down like you! Think about it… Who knows all your wildest dreams & wishes?? Probably the same entity that also knows your biggest fears & weaknesses! YOU!
There will be times when you lose all control! War takes over & exposes your weaknesses! & not many people are understanding, accepting, or supportive when it comes to Chemical Imbalances of the Brain. Instead they label you as an ungrateful & undeserving bitch. I’ve even been told many times how I should have had my ass beat!
Eventually the feelings of guilt & unworthiness take over. & all you see yourself as is a burden who’s undeserving of all love!
I spent 8 really bad years hating & holding myself back! & then one day something came over me & I read & researched my problems for hours! Reading from everything to first hand experience to medical terminology! & I regret I didn’t do it sooner, because everything finally made sense! I don’t act out on purpose!! I have a serious real life invisible illness! My brain can either make too much or not enough endorphins! Leaving me completely unstable. I’ve always explained myself as either being too high or too low, never reaching a balance in the middle! & that hasn’t changed, probably never will… I changed one thing that day, I accepted myself for who I am!
My entire life changed after that! I had walked around with the weight of the world on my shoulders for over 8 years! Thank the Lord those years are over!!!
I still am not right in the head & never will be, but I have come to love even that. In the end my mental illness is not me, but it had a lot to do with making me who I am today!
I am proud of myself, I survived, I am still surviving!
I was correctly diagnosed as a very young teen after spending a week in Lewis-Gale Psych! I was the nicest, quietest, most respectful person on the entire floor! I wasn’t anything like the others who were also admitted… Most of them acted out fighting the staff & acting uncontrollable for the attention! I was being the best me I could be in that dark moment. I just wanted to get home to my mom!
After 5 long days I got word I was being released 2 days early for good behavior! I never expected what happened next… As the Dr made a list of my diagnosis or ‘labels’! Giving me strict follow up & prescriptions!
I’ve been seen by multiple Psychiatrists since… Been on handfuls of different antipsychotics & mood stabilizers! (Still haven’t found any that work for me, so I continue the search!)
And I personally inherited my disorders… I got my daddy’s tongue and temper! & as my mom says ‘I got it honestly!’
I have been fighting this battle for over 10 years, I have been labeled for over 10 years, & only in the last year I have opened up about it…
Stop Self Diagnosing Mental Illness!!!
Real Diagnosis aren’t created off one hour of thoughts & emotions!!! It takes real time!
& I don’t fight this real everyday battle for people to just throw my disorders around like a dodgeball! It’s because of these kind of people mental illness is not taken seriously!
Terri Lee Elliott